SCAD Pretty Police declares photos of sick mother “Gross.”
Tiny Voice, one of Dear Leader’s worker bees, posted photos of her mother’s battle with cancer on Tiny Voice’s social media accounts. When Tiny Voice’s posts were discovered by the Savannah College of Art and Design’s Pretty Police—she was ordered to remove all references to her grandmother and mother’s battle with cancer because:
“Photos of bald women fighting cancer are gross—they do not fit with SCAD’s Brand Promise. As a SCAD employee, you do not have personal interests outside SCAD!”
Tiny Voice was told to take down her social media posts or to resign her position immediately.
Earlier this year, Tiny Voice created a site honoring her family’s successful battle with breast cancer. Tiny Voice posted photos of her mother and grandmother—two courageous and strong women—as they endured the ravages of chemotherapy. She also documented their victory over cancer, and posted links that allowed visitors to donate money for cancer research.
“It was a labor of love,” said Tiny Voice, “I felt that the world needed to see how the support of a strong family, the care of wonderful doctors and a close relationship with God can lead to a successful cancer treatment plan.”
This personal crusade could have gone on indefinitely where it not for the benevolent intervention of Glenn Angora, Dear Leader’s beard, former SCAD Student, and well-known Savannah Grinder aficionado.
Enter the SCAD Pretty Police Surveillance Machine:
Mr. Angora quickly pulled together all the personal photos and comments Tiny Voice had posted over the past year and confronted her with the evidence.
“I remember the day my personal life was exposed,” said Tiny Voice, “I was brought into the office. All my private online activity had been printed out and was laid out on the table in the office for all to see. It was a horrifying and shaming process—It was then that I realized I had failed our Dear Leader.”
“We have been watching you… Would you care to explain this?” Glen Angora asked…
“What could I say?” I thought… “I posted all that un-pretty cancer-related material on the web for the whole world to see… and I’m sure that posting it had an effect on SCAD’s sinking enrollment numbers. I immediately saw how selfish I had been” Tiny Voice confessed.
After a week at SCAD re-education Camp #9, Tiny Voice has had time to reflect on her sins against the SCAD Brand-Promise:
“I was so busy trying to honor cancer survivors that I forgot my real job, that of documenting and recording what the SCAD faculty were posting on their Facebook, Twitter, and personal blog—I let the SCAD brand promise down, and more importantly, I let Dear Leader down.”
On a positive note: Tiny Voice is expected to graduate first in her re-education class this week. After which she will return to Lai Wa Hall armed with new tools enabling her to better monitor SCAD faculty online activities. Scad Secrets wishes her the best.
“I am so grateful for my second chance.” gushed a tearful Tiny Voice, “I am now better equipped to spy on—er.. Pa-Troll’ SCAD faculty online activities because of this experience.”
Do you have your own ‘Pretty Police’ or SCAD Surveillance story to tell? Send it in confidence to our private super secret contact form here (seriously, we don’t have any way of telling who sent us what).
From her porch at the Landings, Dear Leader encouraged the SCAD community to monitor each other’s online activity stating “the highest and best use of a front porch is to enable and encourage the art of conversation. We entertain ourselves with stories on the porch. We invite people in. We sit. We visit.”
All stories on www.SCADSECRETS.com are parodies.All content on www.SCADSECRETS.com is fictionalized and any resemblance to persons living or dead is purely coincidental. This site and the content contained within are not affiliated with the Savannah College of Art & Design, A university of creative careers founded by Ms. Paula Wallace who is practically perfect in every way.
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